"Magical Girl Electric Emily"

7,000 words

the park bench is cold against Emily's back as she looks up at the night sky

one star stands out as brighter than the others to her

she adjusts her glasses, unsure whether it's growing brighter or the round frames are slipping down her face

it soon grows even brighter, bright enough to dispel any suspicion that it isn't moving

"maybe a satellite?" she wonders to herself as it grows ever brighter and bigger

it quickly grows large and close enough for her to see that it's a perfect dark circle with an increasingly large burning halo around it

by the time she realizes it must be headed straight for her, the circle at the center has shrunk even more

a moment later, it hits the ground in the park's baseball diamond a few yards from her, obliterating home plate, but not wrecking much else

she stands up from the bench and surveys the meteorite

it's a small, perfect black sphere not much larger than a marble

somehow, despite the flaming halo of its entry into the atmosphere, it's colder to the touch than the night air

it flakes apart as she turns it over in her hand, thin black flakes scattering onto the ground and leaving nothing left in her hand

the next Monday, she's back in class and feeling very tired

her ears have been ringing on and off all morning and every voice she hears somehow sounds off in a way she can't explain

she tries her best to keep from nodding off, but by the end of the class, the friend sitting next to her can tell that something is wrong

she and Sophie have been friends ever since they met in a philosophy class freshman year and bonded over a shared taste in anime and both having written fanfic of the same lesbian ship

"what's wrong, Emily? you're lucky the prof didn't call on you while you were dozing off there"

"I dunno. I've been really tired and had headaches and my ears have been ringing a bunch the past couple days, but it's probably nothing"

"girrrrlll, you've gotta go see a doctor"

"b-but I'm well en-"

"Emily, please"

"okayyy"

she doesn't tell the doctor at the urgent care nearest campus about how voices sound wrong when she describes her symptoms

he shrugs and suggests that she rest for a few days, take some pain meds, and come back if she's feeling worse

she sighs to herself as she walks out

this is just what she was worried would happen when Sophie told her to go

a couple days later, she's feeling better

her umbrella shields her from the patchy rain as she cuts through a park on the way home from an evening class

she spots a shadow moving at the edge of her vision and turns to see three people walking behind her

she doesn't pay them much attention until they get closer and she starts to worry that they're following her

as they get even closer, she hears them make noises that sound like words but aren't, without even moving their lips

in the light of a too-bright LED streetlight, she gets a clear look at them

all three are identical and their skin looks rubbery

they all stare straight ahead, turning their entire bodies to look right at her

she screams and runs

"<we/us/the swarm> <would like to/shall> <inform/tell/alert> <you/Emily> that the <enemies/entities you are running from> are <aliens/from another star>"

"the fuck? what?"

"<confident/likely> <from/of> <star/light/orb> 5-7366-"

"that's not what I meant, cryptic weirdo in my head"

"<they/the enemies/the aliens> are <overtaking/catching up/surpassing> <you/Emily/us>"

"fuck."

"<we/the nanites> <would like to offer/are offering/bring> a <solution/improved outcome/change>"

she looks over her shoulder

the rubbery person-shaped aliens are indeed much closer than they were a moment ago, running faster than she can with strange, unsettling movements

"hit me with it"

"<grab/hold/squeeze> <your/the> <sun shield/rain shield/umbrella> <with/using> <both/two> <hands/appendages>"

she squeezes her umbrella tightly and it turns blurry as it reshapes itself

the handle narrows in her hands and she squeezes it even tighter

its canopy rapidly disappears, as though devoured by ravenous invisible ants while the central pole contracts and thickens to form a baseball bat that the streetlights glint off of

she doesn't need to be told what to do as she swings the bat at the nearest alien before it even finishes transforming

with a loud splat, she sends its head flying

"guess I'd better join the softball team" she jokes to herself

the bat changes shape slightly, seeming to shimmer in the night air

she squeezes it tighter and winds up for the next swing, hitting the next alien square in the chest

it collapses to the ground, flailing in a way that no human or earth creature moves, with arms and legs striking the air as though they could lift it off the ground before going still

she hits the final alien in the shoulder, sending one arm splatting to the ground

as the limb twitches on the ground, she hits the alien again square in the identical face

she pants in the soft rain as what she just did hits her

she's just beaten up three person-shaped ... things (she hesitates to say "people") with a baseball bat that was an umbrella a moment earlier

"did I ... did I just kill them?"

"<they/the aliens> <are/were> <androids/automatons/robots>"

she turns away from her strange rubbery victims for the long walk home

as the rain picks up and water starts to drip from her bleach-blonde hair, she asks her new companion a question: "any chance of turning my umbrella back?"

"<insufficient/lacking/missing> <energy/power/warmth>"

"great." she sighs to herself

her walk home from the park feels ten times longer in the rain than on a clear day

she soon gives up on wiping the raindrops off her glasses; her wet shirt just turns them into wet smears

the beatdown she just delivered doesn't feel entirely real, despite the baseball bat that she definitely didn't leave class with

she keeps thinking about the inhuman way they flailed and their noises that were almost speech but not quite

she keeps wondering what on Earth (or perhaps what in the galaxy) she's gotten herself into, but the strange voice of the "nanites" doesn't return to her thoughts on her lonely walk home

the few other people out in the rain, walking wet dogs or dashing from bus stops, spot her weapon and look of intense concentration and give her a wide berth, crossing the street away from her

no matter how heavy and pointless it feels in her hand, she keeps a tight grip on the baseball bat

she is going to get her damn umbrella back.

after a soaking wet æon, she squelches up the stairs into her apartment and stands in the shower, cursing how slowly the water warms up

cold and wet eventually becomes warm and wet and then lukewarm and damp

hair still wrapped in a towel, she starts making some hot chocolate

a few minutes later, she pats the side of the mug with her hand, stirs it, and takes a tentative sip

even though it's still a bit too hot to drink, she appreciates its warmth

she picks up the baseball bat and asks a question to the empty air in front of her: "so... do you guys wanna give me my umbrella back?"

without a word, the bat grows hazy and reforms into her umbrella, perfectly dry and neatly folded up

"care to explain who the hell you are?" she takes another sip and asks

"<we/the swarm> are a <network/collection> of alien <nanomachines/nanites> <inside/within> your brain and body" comes the answer inside her head

"well, that's an answer, but now I just have more questions and my head hurts from trying to talk to you"

"<communication/thought mapping/conversation> can be <improved/resolved> with additional <material/fuel>. <eat/consume/absorb> ... <3/three/III> <1¢ coins/pennies/copper tokens>"

"you-you want me to eat pennies?"

"additional <copper/29th element> <is necessary/can be used>-"

"okay, okay" she interrupts, dragging the train of thought in her head that isn't hers to a reluctant stop

she rummages through her coffee can of coins (mostly quarters for laundry) for three decently clean looking pennies

she makes a face and puts the first on her tongue and washes it down with now-cooler hot chocolate

the other two follow it down her throat before the nanites return to her thoughts

"in short, we are 2³² nanobots from planet 2-337-902 capable of matter manipulation"

"okay, but how did-"

"we were inside the meteorite in the park and your warmth reäctivated us after our long journey"

"and how are you t-"

"we reached pseudo-sentience by binding to the structure of your brain, which is also how we're talking to you"

"could you please stop interrupting my thoughts?"

"sorry"

"so, why were those aliens from planet 5-whatever after me?"

"nanite technology is resource-intensive to produce, even for interstellar civilizations, and you happen to be a macro-scale container for some very advanced nanites, if we do say so ourselves"

"okay, but why did they look like people?"

"under current galactic law, whoever is responsible for making the first public contact with a new planet is responsible for bringing them up to galactic standard"

"so they want to grab you guys and sneak off so they're not responsible for galactic child support for Earth?"

"we would not have phrased it like that, but you're right"

"wait, if you fucked off, they wouldn't be chasing me, right?"

"outside of your vessel, we would most likely cease to be sentient, and we do not desire that"

"damn"

"furthermore, they would likely still seek revenge. our departure would not make us or you safer"

"so what, even if you did leave and we found some way to keep you... alive, I guess? they might still go after me?"

"molecular sieves are very efficient at recovery of nanotechnology, ourselves included. they may render you a paste on principle"

"fuck."

"if I'm going to be fighting aliens, I'm going to need more than just an umbrella that turns into a baseball bat. you've dropped a lot of responsibility on me just from touching that damn meteorite and I'm going to need a lot of power to make up for it"

the nanites take a long moment before responding

"we can rebuild your bones out of metal for increased durability and make you a better weapon"

her answer to their question is an immediate grimace

"the fuck? no! come up with something better, or I'm going to urgent care and asking them to cook me with the x-ray machine until you shut up"

"are you that willing to hurt yourself just to get rid of us? really?"

"maaaaybe."

"may we suggest...?" they stall mid-sentence, the locomotive of a train of thought steaming on ahead without its wagons

"may we suggest an arrangement akin to that of a 'magical girl'?"

"go on..." she mumbles half-aloud, a pit opening in her stomach

she's seen enough anime to know how this can go wrong

"yeah, I could go for that" she thinks, her curiosity and fears of getting turned into a paste getting the better of her

"most of the time, you will be an ordinary girl, albeit with us lurking in your head, but when danger strikes, we will activate and modify your body to fight more efficiently."

"do I get the glitter?"

"unfortunately, we will not be able to provide a full transformation sequence like in anime, but we believe this will still serve to minimize the impact on your normal life"

"reassembling my clothes like that stunt with the umbrella is basically a transformation sequence. I'm sure you can do that"

"this is important to the performance of a 'magical girl'?"

"I can't be a magical girl without a cute outfit. it's absolutely essential." she says authoritatively, struggling to contain her excitement, despite still being steeped in anxiety

"then we'll prioritize outfit and weapon architecture."

"sooo, what magical girl powers were you offering?"

"strength is the main capability we're focusing on. the bat reached terminal velocity at no point during this evening's encounter with the aliens and we can definitely do better than that"

"yeah, yeah. can you do some sort of bow or gun or something so I don't have to get so close to them?"

"unfortunately, no. a projectile would quickly leave our communication range and grow unstable, and each one would require you to carry around additional mass"

"okay, I guess I can stick with the bat. can I also get some 'movement tech'?"

"movement tech?"

"like how magical girls move quickly and gracefully in anime"

"is strength and an enhanced jump not sufficient? our projections suggest-"

"give me magical girl movement tech, or else the aliens will turn us both into a paste"

"okay, okay, we'll speed up your movements and try to make you 'graceful'"

"body heat isn't going to be sufficient to transform and fight. we're going to need something more powerful. can you please look up energy sources by density on your phone?"

"if you're such an advanced alien computer, can't you go on the internet yourselves?"

"your planet's data networks have evolved in a completely different way to the ones we were designed for and we estimate that even attempting to go on the internet would use vastly more energy than is currently available to us"

she begrudgingly opens wikipedia on her phone, and as soon as she starts reading the chart, the nanites chime in

"so, where can you get plutonium?"

"I am not going to eat plutonium."

"we can prevent any cancer and tissue damage it may cause" they answer, picking out the first of her worries

"I don't wanna irradiate anyone or anything, and I don't want to have to have to break into a nuclear reactor to get fuel just to eat it"

"we could get into a reactor no problem. don't forget that you're a magical girl now"

"we're not gonna do that, you little interstellar terrorists"

"don't lie; we saw how much you enjoyed fighting"

"fuck you!"

she scrolls further down the list, past the nuclear reactions and into oxidation reactions

"I don't know where to get hydrogen or beryllium or LNG, and this place doesn't have a gas stove, so no natural gas"

"what about gasoline?"

"we're in the land of Taylor Ham. the gas station attendant isn't gonna let me just stick the fuel nozzle in my mouth and drink it"

"a gas station attendant will be no problem in a fight"

"I'm not beating up some poor gas station attendant just because a voice in my head says I can become a magical girl if I do"

"we're more than a voice in your head-"

"yeah, yeah, but you are a voice in my head"

"we're a voice in your head suggesting that you can get a gas can"

"... oh, right"

after awkwardly lugging the can of high-octane ethanol-free gas home, she pours herself a glass and stares at it with quite a bit of trepidation

its smell fills her nose and her concern only grows

"you're not going to become a magical girl if you don't drink it"

"don't you fucking guilt trip me" she thinks back, picking up the glass

she swirls it in the glass, putting off the inevitable

the nanites' silence in her mind taunts her and she brings it to her lips and takes an experimental sip

it tastes of nothing.

she feels a vague sensation of something lukewarm in her mouth, more through her teeth than her tongue, which now feels distant

"we took the liberty of blocking out your tongue based on your reaction to the smell" the nanites tell her

she downs the rest of the glass in a single sip

sensation soon returns to her tongue and she gags

she spits and rinses and brushes her teeth, scrubbing for what feels like forever

when the oily film is finally gone from her mouth, she tosses a stick of gum in her mouth

"further work is required on this."

"that's a bit of an understatement"

"now that my breath is flammable, is it time for me to become a magical girl?"

"did you want that as a power too-?"

"no, no, that's not what I meant"

"we are ready to transform you."

she stands in front of the mirror and thinks for a long moment before grasping her umbrella and shouting "Magical Girl Electric Emily, go!"

"you don't need to do that"

"I'd barely be a magical girl without it, and I like the alliteration"

every muscle in her body tenses involuntarily and then suddenly releases

her clothes quickly dissolve into an opaque blur that surrounds her entire body before rapidly coming back into focus as an ornate pink and white dress

the dark metal baseball bat contrasts sharply with the cute look of the rest of her appearance

"I don't like this outfit, though. too frilly."

the clothes grow hazy and turn into a much lighter outfit, barely more than a bra and a short athletic skirt

"this will interfere minimally with your movements"

"too fanservice-y" she thinks, blushing as she stares at how the top hugs the curves of her chest

"you don't even have fans! unless you meant this?" they ask, turning her baseball bat into a giant folding fan

"fuck you!"

"okay, okay" the nanites almost sigh back as they change the fan back into a bat and move onto another outfit

her new outfit looks like she's on her way to the gym: a tank top and shorts

"it's not bad, but I think you can do better" she shrugs after getting a good look at herself in the mirror

"hmmm.. we're out of ideas, except, wait.."

her outfit changes once again into a dark blue fit and flare dress with a bright pink ribbon neatly tied around her waist

she gives an experimental twirl and smiles as she rests the baseball bat, which has gained a pink stripe down its length, over one shoulder

"yeah, I think this'll do"

she swings her bat through the empty air with a whooshing noise that startles her

"this'll definitely do."

the massive modern courthouse is annoyingly out of the way, but at least it's an excuse to skip class

inside the large and echo-filled lobby, she empties her pockets for inspection and steps through the metal detector

it emits an ear-piercing beep and the cop standing next to it gestures for her to walk back through

she makes a big show of patting her pockets and walks through again to another loud beep

the cop takes out a metal detector wand, which doesn't go off, shrugs, and waves her through to the jury room

"we definitely could've taken the cop in a fight"

"I don't wanna get shot!"

"a bullet's just more material for us. they'd never see the umbrella-bat coming until WHAM! we hit them right in the face"

Emily's morning in the jury room is filled with anxiety

the nanites have made it very clear that it's not a matter of if the aliens come back, but a question of when

every moving shadow, she worries, is an alien coming for her

when she's sent home without having heard any cases, her worries come with her

"Emily, do we need to remind you that we can spot the aliens further out than you can?" the nanites point out on the bus ride home

"but can't they strike anywhere? don't I need to always be ready to fight?"

"being wound up like a spring all the time isn't going to help you fight"

"you sure about that?"

she can hear the aliens gaining on her as she runs

she's not sure where she is; if she stopped to look, she'd notice that the trees to her left are the ones by the river while the empty baseball diamond to her right is the one from the park on the hill, but she isn't stopping to look

she whirls around and leaps towards the aliens chasing her, shouting her transformation phrase: "Magical Girl Electric Emily, go!"

suddenly, she's sitting bolt upright in bed, miles away from either park, fully transformed and heart pounding

as she takes a deep breath, the nanites pipe up

"how were we supposed to know that a dream would feel that real?"

"that's just how dreams are sometimes"

"but it makes no sense! your brain lies to you while you're asleep?"

"better used to it if you're going to live in my head" she sighs

"okaaaaay" the nanites sigh back as they transform her magical girl outfit back into her pajamas

"good night, you dreamless freaks" she mutters half aloud as she lies back down

"why the hell did I become a magical girl, anyway? all I do is sit coiled up like a spring waiting for another fight" she thinks to herself while trying to fall back asleep

she feels the pressure in her mind from the nanites preparing an answer, but they remain mercifully silent

she'd probably cry if they intruded on her innermost thoughts and tried to reassure her that touching that damned meteorite was the right choice

Emily kicks herself for thinking that she could've become a magical girl without paying the price that they always have to pay in anime

the bags of groceries are heavy and all she can think about is how the walk home feels longer every time she does it

she doesn't notice the alien robots headed towards her until a chorus of car horns make their displeasure known at the aliens' jaywalking

four robots shaped like people walk diagonally across the street towards her, ignoring oncoming cars in the busy street

"goddamnit, they're back" she mutters to herself as she sets down the groceries and pulls her umbrella from her purse

ever since her last encounter with aliens, she's carried it everywhere, even on sunny days, just in case they strike again

she firmly grasps the umbrella with both hands and shouts "Magical Girl Electric Emily, go!"

her clothes quickly turn into her magical girl outfit: a dress devoid of frills save for a ribbon around her waist

she leaps towards the nearest robot and drastically overshoots

Emily flails as her nanite-strengthened jump carries her off the sidewalk, over the curb, and into the narrow excuse of a bike lane

she twirls back around, skirt flaring out, and runs at the alien robots, winding up her swing with her baseball bat

with a swift movement, she knocks off an enemy's head and sends it flying all the way to the opposite sidewalk

her next swing is not so successful and only beats empty air, the person-shaped robot she was aiming for having dodged out of her way

Emily steps closer and winds up to hit it again, but it steps away yet again and she's forced to run at it

her blow knocks its legs out from under it and as it writhes on the sidewalk, the magical girl hopes that the ice cream in her grocery bag hasn't melted yet

the next-closest robot is rapidly shuffling back and forth as though convinced its opponent cannot hit a moving target

she doesn't care about its ploy and simply swings at its chest

as she spins towards her last enemy, a robot standing still and unblinking in the bike lane, she silently expresses her thanks for movement tech

her swing knocks the robot's head clean off in a way that she thinks is graceful

a quick look around confirms that no more aliens have shown up and Electric Emily becomes just Emily again

"awh, I was looking forward to getting home with movement tech"

"we don't have enough gas for that. 'movement tech' is extremely energy inefficient"

"it's extremely fun though"

"indeed"

Emily's stomach growls as she rummages through her kitchen cabinets

the only food she finds is two cans of peaches on a shelf in the back of one behind the half-full gas can that serves as yet another marker of her choice to become a magical girl

as her stomach growls again, even more insistently this time, the nanites helpfully offer her a solution

"we could convert gasoline into sugars your body could use so you don't go to bed hungry"

"I'm a girl, not a fucking lawnmower! I'll drink gasoline for you .. freaks, but I'm not going to drink it for dinner"

she opens a drawer and takes out a well-worn menu for a local pizza joint

"okay, yeah, pizza will taste a hell of a lot better than a glass of gasoline"

"told you so." she thinks back as she calls for delivery

asking Sophie out is scarier than even the threat of getting ground up by aliens to extract nanites from her

she can't just bludgeon her way into her heart or through the butterflies fluttering in her stomach

"heyyyy, wanna go to the museum with me?" she nervously texts and sets the phone down

their path through the museum takes them backwards in time, starting from contemporary media art, through a special exhibit of fine art photographs of stone quarries and into several rooms of paintings of ships from the 19th century and early American furniture

the ornate chairs with signs reminding visitors not to sit on them blur together, the ones in every room looking just about the same

the gallery of European Renaissance/Late Medieval art is a large room with an ornate stone and stained glass church façade from somewhere in France at its center

sculptures stand watch at either side of the façade and paintings and display cases line the walls

at the back of the room, beside an almost-life-size painting of a minor Italian nobleman, stands a suit of armor and a display of swords and weaponry

"I didn't take you for a sword lesbian"

"I'm not really one, but I think they're neat"

the nanites wait for a lull in the conversation with Sophie to rib her about it too

"looking for an upgrade from the baseball bat?"

"maaaaaybe. that long one with the axe head on it looks nice"

"the halberd?"

as the girls cross the threshold into a room dominated by a mostly-brown painting of a very pained-looking Jesus, the nanites interrupt Emily's train of thought

"we don't mean to ruin your date, but there appear to be at least four alien signals approaching your location"

Emily physically recoils to this news

"you okay, Emily?" Sophie asks

"I'm .. I'm not sure" she hesitates before answering

"tired from all this walking?"

"kinda, yeah. maybe I'll feel better if I go outside?"

inside her head, her worries have reached a fever pitch, her fears of aliens attacking Sophie repeating themselves constantly

"I think all this walking and the air conditioning and that tour group we keep crossing paths with are getting to me. I'm gonna go outside for a bit and come back in when I've calmed down"

"see you soon!"

as she walks purposefully through the gallery, she worries to herself

"did I just fake a panic attack to leave a date and go fight aliens? what am I even doing?"

"we would argue with the claim that you were faking it, and we are sharing a head with you. we don't know much about human emotional responses, but is it not reasonable to panic about the possibility of aliens attacking someone you care about?"

"okay, okay"

"left out of the entrance. they're in the north corner of the parking lot" the nanites say, suddenly becoming much more businesslike

"can I get a stabby—I mean a halberd this fight?"

"we thought you'd say that. your umbrella will be enough material and we're ready when you are"

she spots the aliens in the back corner of the parking lot

there's five of them, all wearing the same rubbery simulacrum of a face, and they all turn towards her in unison as she approaches

"Magical Girl Electric Emily, go!" she shouts, launching into a run as the transformation hits and her muscles tense and release

her new halberd materializes out of the folded umbrella and she twirls it experimentally

it weighs about the same as her old baseball bat, but it definitely spins differently

she swings at the nearest alien robot and misses

"fuck!" she mutters to herself

"want the bat back?"

"nah, I think I've got it" she thinks back as she skewers a robot and swings it into its neighbors

she pulls the halberd out of the skewered robot and swings the axe side at another enemy

its arm flops to the ground and twitches for a moment before falling still

it runs at her with its other arm outstretched and she deflects its charge with the shaft of her polearm and kicks its legs out from under it

with a triumphant twirl, she brings her weapon down and decapitates the alien robot

the two remaining robots turn and raise their arms to right angles in unison

they both run at her and she stabs the one to her left, running it through, but leaving her right side open

the last robot's hand-shaped appendage (it'd be a stretch to call something without individually movable fingers a "hand") rams into her side with great force, four rubbery fingers hitting her as one solid mass

"owwwww! fuck!" she shouts, swinging the still-squirming impaled enemy at the one that hit her, knocking it to the ground

filled with fury, she stabs at it repeatedly, not even taking the time to pull the previous one off her halberd

she stands, panting, in the corner of the parking lot, surrounded by defeated alien robots

the nanites transform her outfit back and turn her halberd into an umbrella, but the pain remains

she winces as she takes her phone from her pocket

"don't even think about going back in the museum. you broke a rib in that fight and need to rest" the nanites caution her

"okaaay, you tiny spoilsports" she sighs

"i'm still not feeling too good and i think i'm just gonna go home. sorry!! see you soon!" she texts Sophie

"no worries! feel better soon!" she texts back

"can't you synthesize me some painkillers or something?"

"a sufficient quantity of the only painkiller we know how to make would cause severe liver damage, and we're not letting you push through a _broken rib_ just because you're gay for her"

"okay, okay, I'll go home"

every step she makes sends a jolt of pain through her, making the relatively short trip home a journey of suffering

she collapses into bed as soon as she gets home, which proves to be a mistake as she lands directly on her broken rib

with a series of pained noises, she rotates into the least painful position she can find, which still hurts

"maybe a pillow would help?"

"fuck you, all ten bajillion of you"

she stands up, wincing, and stumbles to the bathroom

the girl looking back at her from the mirror looks deeply tired and pained

she dumps the bottle of ibuprofen into her hand, not counting the pills and just wanting the pain to be gone

with a single gulp, the magical girl swallows the pain meds

she flops back into bed, wedging a pillow beneath herself which does help, no matter how little she wants to admit that the nanites were right

"could you please rotate 2½ degrees to the right?"

"what?"

"that should be the optimal position for us to reassemble your bones"

she obliges and turns a bit to the right

"back ⅓ of a degree to the left"

"I'm a girl, not a goddamned protractor" she sighs

Emily lies in bed, trying to sleep, but it doesn't come, the pain in her ribs stabbing into her

"when're you gonna be done fixing my bones?" she asks, bored

"approximately five minutes ago" the nanites reply

"you could've told me!"

"we didn't want to interrupt your sleep. you get upset when we do that"

"I wasn't asleep yet!"

"it's not like we can tell!"

"we would like to remind you of our earlier offer of rebuilding your bones out of metal. it would have prevented this .. incident"

"preying on a woman in pain, eh?"

"would another time be better to discuss this?"

"no, no, it's not like we have anything else to talk about now"

"with sufficient supplies of <12th element>, we can replace all of the structural portions of your bones"

"I thought you were going to stop with the weird .. beaming concepts directly thing"

"sorry, but we couldn't find a suitable word for it"

"okay, it's really fucking weird, but maybe you were right. maybe I do need metal bones"

"we will need to obtain approximately ten kilograms of .. this metal to match the weight of your skeleton"

"it's kinda creepy that you know what my skeleton weighs"

"we are inside your body"

a few days later, a box arrives, surprisingly light for being full of metal ingots

she tosses one into the air and catches it, more than a bit amused

"so I just .. lay on these and you'll bring it in through my skin?" she asks the nanites, slightly repulsed by their plan

"yes, unless you want to eat ten kilograms of magnesium shavings and ball bearings"

"okaaaay" she sighs, setting the metal bars down on her bed

they're cold against her skin as she lays on top of them

she feels herself sinking into them and feels something cold itching beneath her skin

she reaches to scratch her back, but a few sharp words from the nanites stop her

the itching soon fades, but the cold does not

she lies in bed, curled up under blankets to warm the cold inside of her, and wonders why she agreed to this

it seemed like a good idea at the time, like so many things, but now she's gone so far down the path of a magical girl that she worries nobody will ever understand her

thinking about how nobody else has entirely metal bones and noöne else has ever felt solid metal seep in through their skin just makes her lonely

the inside of the planetarium dome that the two girls look up at is much darker than their local New Jersey night sky

as the stars fade in, Sophie excitedly squeezes Emily's hand

the presenter begins by pointing out some well-known constellations, and the nanites excitedly point out their home star

only a few minutes in, a loud crash interrupts the presenter and the projected stars vanish

with another crash, a bright crack appears in the domed ceiling, followed by more as it splits open like an egg, pieces of ceiling hanging precariously from rebar

Sophie stands up and turns to flee, but looks back to see Emily standing still and staring intently at the massive hole in the ceiling

"fucking hell, they're here too"

"what? who-?"

"the aliens are back to get me, but at least I know they come from Aldebaran now. run! I'll see you soon— Magical Girl Electric Emily, go!"

the tension and release pass through her muscles like waves from head to toe as her clothes reform into her dark blue dress

the magical girl leaps toward the fractured ceiling and as she launches herself further upwards off the hanging rebar, she catches a glimpse of her crush running away to safety

she lands on the roof and looks around for aliens, spotting humanoid robots on the roof and what looks like a giant green crab almost as large as the planetarium building itself out in the parking lot

she twirls her halberd and runs at the nearer robot, cleanly running it through before leaping down to the ground

three more robots run at her before she even hits the pavement, and her blade stabbing into one of them breaks her fall

she makes quick work of the other two, kicking one and cutting the other in half with a diagonal stroke of her polearm

the magical girl turns toward the giant green crab, sizing it up and looking for a weak point in its armored shell

she runs at its legs, but before she can get there, one of the crab's giant claws swoops in from behind her and lifts her into the air

she flails, kicking uselessly at the claw

as the crab lifts her even higher into the air, the nanites have a suggestion for her

"your halberd is strong enough to be used as a prying tool"

she rolls her eyes and follows their advice, prying the claw apart enough to climb out and jump free

Sophie watches Emily fight from behind a parked car, in a mix of fear and excitement

the girl she's been crushing on pretty much ever since she met her is a magical girl, strong and fast and powerful, just like in the anime they love

she worries that Emily won't be able to make it through this fight alone, though

the crab is massive and Emily's just a girl with what Sophie recognizes from the art museum as a halberd

sure, she's got magic on her side (she even said so!), but even magic must have its limits, she thinks as she watches Emily shrug off a blow that looks like it'd shatter every bone in her body

she turns and runs to a nearby convenience store and, panting, buys every single can of pink monster energy they have, as well as a few candy bars

Sophie's seen her drinking the pink cans enough times while studying late at night to know that it's just what she'll need in the fight

she runs back across the street, hoping that Emily is still fighting, is still alive

she smiles when she catches a glimpse of the cute magical girl leaping with her medieval polearm, but her expression turns to worry when the crab swats her away

she tumbles through the air, growing larger and larger in Sophie’s eyes until she collides with the pavement right next to the car she's hiding behind

"Emily!"

"Sophie!"

"how're you holding up?"

"barely hanging in there and running out of gas, but I've gotta keep going"

"take this" she says, pressing a can of monster into the magical girl's hand

she looks on, more than a little surprised, as the can dissolves into thin air

she dutifully hands her another can, which she cracks open and pounds in a single long swig before it too dissolves

"what the hell did you do to the cans?"

"the nanites disassembled it for the metal"

"the what-?"

their conversation is interrupted by the thudding footsteps of the crab approaching their hiding spot

"I'll explain later when I kiss you" she says, climbing on top of the parked car

"promise?"

"promise."

she turns toward the crab, brandishes her halberd, and shouts "this isn't even my final form, you fool!" before leaping towards her enemy

"we didn't practice this! the hell are we supposed to do?" ask the nanites in her head

"you're an alien supercomputer; think of something"

before she's to the peak of her jump, her weapon begins to change, turning from a polearm to a hazy cloud that reforms into a two-handed longsword

as her boots hit the the crab, she catches a glimpse of herself reflected in the shiny green shell and notices that her outfit has changed too

in her hiding place behind the car, Sophie can't help but smile at the way her crush's dress has turned into a separate crop top and skirt and her hair has turned from bleach-blonde to bubblegum pink

it's not quite as revealing as the outfit she dismissed as "fanservice", but it definitely shows off more than the dress did

the crab reaches for the magical girl with a giant claw and she swings her sword, cutting it in half

"we knew you'd like it" the nanites say to her as she swings

the claw crashes to the ground with an earth-shattering thud

enraged, the crab shakes violently, trying to shake her off

she tries to stab into its shell to hold on, but her blade glances off and she slides back to the ground

she hits the ground running, hoping to steer it away from Sophie's hiding spot

the crab takes the bait and turns away from the car she hides behind with thunderous steps

Emily zigs and zags trying to find a good angle to hit it from

she sees what she thinks is an angle and leaps for it, sword slicing through empty air as she overshoots

trying her best not to flail, she arcs back to the ground

she spots a shadow moving over her and looks to see a car flying towards her, flung by the crab

she raises her sword and moves just in time to cut the car cleanly in half, sending oil and coolant and fuel spraying around her

as the two halves crash to the ground to either side of her, she jumps onto the ruined car's roof, shattering what's left of its sunroof, and leaps towards her enemy

this time, she doesn't miss.

her blade plunges into the crab's unarmored mouth and all the way through the shell

the crab crashes to the ground and twitches a bit before going still

Emily looks around the parking lot strewn with smashed cars, stabbed alien robots, and a giant green crab in search of what she cares the most about: Sophie

she runs towards her crush, the nanites giving her one last burst of speed, and wraps her arms around her

"Sophie!"

"Emily!" she replies, gazing into the exhausted magical girl's eyes and smiling at her

"soooooooo, you gonna kiss her or what?" the nanites chime in in Emily's thoughts after their quiet embrace has gone on for a moment

she answers the taunting in her mind by giving Sophie a quick peck on the cheek, and Sophie responds by scooting her hand down the magical girl's back to the gap her transformed outfit has conveniently left for her, pulling her even closer, and kissing her square on the lips

for the long moment of their kiss, the girls forget that they're in a parking lot filled with wreckage, just how exhausted they are, and about everything that isn't each other

FIN.

thank you to kim, a certain far-away sparkle, and madison taylor for proofreading